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Book One Revelations - Chapter 14
When I finally woke up from a very long dreamless sleep, I was not lying on the leather couch or in my house. I slowly looked around the room and realized I was in a hospital room! The room was blindingly bright. I looked down and found a hot pink cast on my leg. Well, what the hell! Why would I have a cast up above my knee, for an ankle break? Wasn't that a bit excessive? I was wearing a horrible hospital gown. Yes, I do believe a hospital gown is actually uglier than my school uniform! I moaned and laid my head back down on my pillow.
My ribs were tightly wrapped, and I could breathe a little easier today. It hurt to take a deep breath but I was able to accomplish it now. Well at least I had one improvement. I tried to move my hand to cover my eyes and I felt something pulling at it. Ugh, I had a needle stuck in my hand [link widoczny dla zalogowanych]! There were two IV bags dripping into it, it was ice cold. My hand was cramping and burning from the solutions. The look of the needle poking into my skin, just made me want to throw up.
I averted my eyes from the horrible needle and noticed the clock on the wall. It was 11 am. I couldn't figure out how to turn on my TV, I think the remote was broken. So I laid there watching the second hand tick around the clock. I was bored to death. Where was everyone? Where was Mr. Thompson?
Just when I thought my boredom would kill me, I heard a knock on the door. "Can we come in?" It was Mel!
"Mel!" I called. She rushed over and gave me a big hug. Behind her was Gezabelle! Was Gezabelle her mom? I couldn't believe it. Mel had dish water blond hair, where her mom's was golden blond. Mel's hair was much thinner than her mom's. Mel had muddy green eyes, where her mom had mesmerizing emerald green eyes. I just kept staring back and forth between them. Holy crap that's it! Mel isn't eighteen yet. Her birthday is in the summer some time. My hair got darker and thicker when I turned eighteen. Also my eyes went from a Denham Blue to a bright Aqua Blue. I thought I was imagining the changes I saw in myself. But as I sat there looking at Mel and her mom, I realized I was looking at before and after. The ugly duckling turns into the beautiful swan! Well, Mel was not an ugly duckling, but I'm sure she feels like it when she is standing next to her mom.
I smiled even wider, now that I understood. "Hello Gezabelle and Mel. I didn't know you were Mel's mom."
Gezabelle patted my arm and gave Mel and me a warm smile. She looked happy to see her daughter and I were friends. "Yes, I have the pleasure of having such a beautiful daughter!" Mel blushed and looked embarrassed. "Sarah, I have altered your costume for the competition. I made it extra long so the pooling of the fabric would easily hide your cast."
"Oh, thank you! Do you know when they will spring me out of this place?" I asked. Gezabelle laughed quietly. "You'll be at the performance right? The whole "production" is Mel's idea. She came up with the entire idea. She sure does come to life, when she's running the show!" I winked at Mel and squeezed her hand. Now I know where Mel got her take charge attitude.
"Really?" Gezabelle raised an eyebrow at Mel.
"Oh mom, it's not that big of a deal." Mel said. I could tell Gezabelle was very proud of her daughter.
"Well, Sarah, if it is alright with you. Melody and I would like to "spring you" from this joint as soon as the doctor comes and checks on you. We would also love it if you stayed the night with us next Friday night before the competition. Mr. Thompson has agreed to the sleep over. He is running an errand right now and asked if we could drive you home." Gezabelle said. Mel looked like she was going to bounce off the wall. This would be my first girl sleep over. I was suddenly just as excited as Mel.
"Oh, I would love it! Besides, I'm sure Mel wants to treat me like a Barbie Doll and play with my hair for the competition!" I replied. All three of us laughed.
"Of course Sarah! I have tons of ideas. The back of your hair is going to lie in ringlets. The hair around your face will be pulled back. I think I might add a few flowers onto the crown too!" Mel replied. She was talking a million miles a minute and her mom was just beaming.
"Promise you'll me gentle!" I told her.
"Of course!" She assured me. She bent over and gave me a gentle hug, avoiding my ribcage. Mel was turning into my best friend. Her and Jess would get a long great.
"So Gezabelle, can you help me start a writing campaign to get our horrid school uniforms changed? At the minimum can we get rid of the knee high socks?" I asked. I was going to love having people around who I could talk about fashion, makeup, hairstyles, and all the other girly stuff.
"Ugh, I told you not to get her started!" Mel said and rolled her eyes.
"Sarah, I detest those horrid things. I just want to burn all that polyester and yes, why do they make young ladies wear knee highs. For heaven's sake!" Gezabelle said as she wrinkled up her nose in disgust. Mel and I laughed at her.
The three of us talked for another hour until the doctor walked in. It was so easy to talk to Mel and her mom. I haven't enjoyed myself like this in a long time. I could tell Gezabelle cared for me like a mom would. She had a very strong maternal bond with Mel and it made my heart swell with happiness watching the two of them.
"How are you feeling today Miss. Townsend?" asked Dr. Templeton.
Gezabelle turned to Mel, "Honey why don't you wait outside for us." Mel said sure and gave me one last squeeze of my hand before she left.
After the door was closed, the doctor lifted my gown to check on my ribs. "Does this hurt?" he asked as he poked a around.
I winced slightly at his probing fingers. "It's still tender, but I can breathe a lot easier." He simply nodded. Then he went to my cast and had me wiggle my toes. He poked them with a pin and asked if I could feel it which I could.
"Why is the cast so big?" I asked when he was done.
The doctor looked at Gezabelle, to make sure he could answer me. She nodded at him, then reached down to hold my hand and stroked my hair out of my face.
The doctor went over to a light board and put up x-rays. It took me a minute to understand what I was seeing. "Do you see these two bones here?" He was pointing to two bones in my lower leg that weren't lined up. I nodded and let him continue. He lowered his chin, so he could look at me over the top of his glasses. "That was an old break that never healed properly. I couldn't leave it like that or you would have problems with it later on in life. I re-broke the bone and put pins in your leg to realign the bones. You're ankle needed a few pins inserted as well."
Gezabelle squeezed my hand. "Sarah, do you remember that break?"
"Yes Ma'am. My uncle had kicked me. His cowboy boot did a direct blow to my shin. That was last summer. Right before I got my fire power." I didn't like remembering those times. Gezabelle kept gently stroking my hair trying to soothe me.
The doctor put up another film that showed my ribs. Several areas on the film had red marks circling around faint white lines. Gezabelle gasped and I turned my head away. I couldn't see anymore. I kept my head turned as the doctor put up several other x-rays for Gezabelle to look at. She was frozen beside me and I avoided looking at her face. I didn't need to see the images on the light board. I lived it.
When the doctor finished, he turned off the light board and put my films away. He told me he would have a nurse come remove my IV, so I could leave. Gezabelle thanked him. "Do you want me to bring Melody back in the room now?" she asked.
"Give me a moment please." I responded. She nodded and let me regain control of my emotions. "I don't want Mel to know about this."
"I understand." she said. She went over to a closet and pulled my clothes out. "Here let me help you get dressed." She helped me sit up and very carefully pulled my clothes on for me.
After I was dressed I took a few deep breaths. Well as deep as I could manage. "Ok, I'm ready." Gazelle walked over to the door and brought Melody back in the room.
"Well I got sprung!" I told Melody with as much enthusiasm as I could muster. Gezabelle gave me a concerned look. She knew I was fighting old demons, and trying my best to stay happy for Melody.
Just then a young nurse came in to take my IV out. She didn't look much older then me. I turned my head and scrunched up my face. "Ewww!" I said as I felt the needle come out. Mel laughed at me for being grossed out by the needle.
Gezabelle walked out to the hallway and returned with a wheelchair. "Well young lady, ready for a ride out of this place?" she asked.
"Yes Ma'am. Get me out of here and away from those needles!" Gezabelle and Melody both giggled at me. They helped me from the bed to the wheelchair.
"Oh, wait!" Mel said. She rummaged through her purse and pulled a brush out. "You cannot go outside with your hair looking like that!" She quickly brushed out my hair then smiled at me. "Okay, now you're good. What would have happened if we ran into any cute guys with you looking like that?" she said.
I laughed so hard it made my ribs hurt. "Oh, don't make me laugh so hard it hurts!" Melody held my hand while her mom pushed me out of the hospital.
Melody and Gezabelle drove me home and helped me into the North sitting room where I lied down on the large Victorian sofa when Charlotte came in to check on me.
"Oh, Melody it's lovely to see you again." Charlotte said.
"Charlotte, this is Gezabelle, Melody's mother." I said to Charlotte then I looked to Gezabelle. "Gezabelle this is Charlotte. She takes wonderful care of me and is the best cook in the world."
Charlotte blushed and the two women shook hands and exchanged pleasantries.
"Sarah, we will leave you to rest now. We will come by to pick you up Friday afternoon." Gezabelle said then leaned down and gave me a light hug.
"Bye Sarah, I'm sorry you fell down the stairs and broke your leg. I'm super excited for Friday night though." Melody said then gave me a big hug and I tried not to wince in pain when she squeezed the ribs too hard.
"I'm very excited for Friday as well Mel. Oh, we'll need to change our show a little. I'm not going to be able to walk with this cast on." I told her.
"Don't worry about it Sarah. Leave it all up to me. I've got tons of ideas!" she said.
I laughed at her. "I'm sure you do!" I gave her a big smile.
"Gezabelle, thank you for everything!" I told her and I knew she understood my double meaning. She gave me a warm smile and nodded.
Charlotte walked them to the front door for me, then came back and covered me with a blanket. She handed me a book to read and propped my leg up on a pillow. "Thank you Charlotte, you're the best." I said.
"I'll be right back with your lunch Dear." She said then Charlotte hurried out of the room. After she walked away I wondered if they were able to get the kitchen back to normal before she came home.
After I finished every last bite of my lunch, I took the pain medicine that Charlotte had sitting on my tray. Then I leaned back, closed my eyes and drifted off to sleep.
I woke to Erik's cool fingers brushing my face. I opened my eyes and smiled at him. "How are you feeling?" he asked softly.
"Better." I whispered.
"I'm glad. Are you hungry? You slept through dinner, but Charlotte left you a plate in the kitchen." he said.
"It's past dinner time? Already? Wow, that pain killer must have really knocked me out!" I said completely shocked.
Erik chuckled at me. "Yes, it is 8pm already. Is there anything you need?"
I raised my hand to his cheek and asked "Can you just hold me please?"
"Sure Baby!" He lifted me up then sat down on the couch with me cradled in his arms. I put my head in the crook of his neck and breathed him in.
"Thank you" I whispered. He pressed his cheek against the top of my head.
I laid cradled in his arms in the darkness for over an hour. We both held each other and never spoke a word. We didn't need to speak. The beating of his heart was the only sound I needed to hear.
"You need something in your stomach, before you take your medicine." He said breaking the silence as he gently lifted me and took me into the kitchen.
He set me on the kitchen counter with my cast resting on the counter. My good leg dangled over the edge and swung lightly as I watched him warm up my plate. I enjoyed watching him move around the kitchen. The lights were off in the kitchen, only the light from the outside security light streamed in through the window. I watched the lights and shadows play across his black hair and blue eyes. The shadows made it hard to tell where they ended and his hair began. When the light hit his eyes they came to life and my body ached to bring that face closer to mine; to trace my fingers around the shadows of his brilliant blue eyes. I desperately wanted to run my fingers through his hair and feel the gentle waves as they dipped and rose again. Sitting here watching him, I knew I would always love him and my body would always desire his.
He came and stood between my legs as I sat on the counter and the desire in me flooded my cheeks. He smiled when he saw my checks redden. He lifted a bite of food from the plate and blew on it before he gave me the bite. My chest was slowly rising and falling in short shallows breaths as I tried not to tremble. I took the bite from his fork and slowly chewed it but I never took my eyes off of his. This felt more sensual than a kiss or a touch. Electricity pulsed through me as I felt the heat from his body that was only inches away from mine.
When I was full and couldn't take the teasing my body was enduring anymore, I shook my head no and leaned forward against his chest breathing in his scent and memorizing his heart beat. He wrapped his arms around me and his fingers ran through my long hair and traced along my back. Still we never spoke.
To soon he gently pulled himself back and stared down at me. His eyes were wandering across my whole face. He was questioning himself, questioning me. He hesitantly leaned in and gave me a very light butterfly kiss then walked away to grab two pain pills. Was he testing himself or testing me? I didn't know but I struggled to control my pulse rate and breathing. He brought the two pills over to me and placed them on my tongue. I wanted to close my mouth around his fingers to taste them but I hesitated and stopped myself. After I washed down the pills I wrapped my arms around his neck and he carried me to my room. My eyes stayed on his face as he carried me to my room. He always made it look so effortless when he carried me.
He gently set me on the edge of my bed and took a nightgown out of my dresser before kneeling on the bed directly behind me. Being extra careful to not lift my arms too high, he gently guided my arms out of my sweater then he lifted it over my head. I shuddered as the cold air hit my skin and the butterflies churned in my stomach as I felt the bed move behind me. He placed the nightgown over my head and helped me with my arms again. He very slowly pulled the nightgown down and I shivered again as his fingers brushed along my skin to my waist. His fingers traced back up along my arms before he came around to the front of me.
He very gently lifted me to my one leg and waited for me to gain my balance. Without ever taking his eyes off of my eyes, he unfastened my skirt and let it fall to the floor while he let my nightgown fall down to my knees. I closed my eyes and took in a slow deep breath to calm my desire to reach out and pull him against me. I was well aware of how quickly he was able to unfasten my skirt and the thought excited and terrified me. My body's reactions were what terrified me the most. He was a perfect gentleman. He laid me on my bed like I was porcelain doll that he was afraid to break.
"Goodnight Sarah. Please sleep well. You are not going to school this next week, so sleep in. Call me if you need me." After he propped my leg up on pillows and covered me up he kissed my forehead.
"Goodnight Erik. Thank you. Today is Saturday, right?" I asked.
"No, Baby. It's already Sunday." He smiled at me as he closed the door behind me.
Sunday? I was in the hospital for two days? I closed my eyes and let the pain pills knock me out.
I slept for most of Monday as well. Erik woke me up around noon to eat and take more pain medicine. I reminded him to wake me so I could call Jess before I fell back asleep. He kissed my forehead and promised he would wake me up.
As promised, he woke me up a little early so I could get cleaned up before I called Jessica. I pulled my hair back into a braid and washed my face. I brushed my teeth before I threw on the clean clothes that Erik had placed in my bathroom for me. He picked a loose fitting short dress to make it easier for me to get dressed. Erik waited for me in my room then carried me down to my computer for me when I was ready. He stayed in the room with me and he browsed through a folder of papers. Work I assumed as I watched his face turn serious and concentrate on what he was reading.
I dialed in and waited for her to get online.
"No." I growled. "Jess, Honey are you okay?" Erik raced over to stand next me and flinched when he saw Jessica's battered face. Jessica's left eye was black and blue and completely swollen shut. Her nose looked broken. Her lip was swollen and split open. She looked like she had been somebody's punching bag. My body started shaking as rage roared through me. I had never wanted to kill anyone before until that very moment. People could hurt me, but don't lay your hands on people I love.
Jessica broke down into tears. "Sarah, oh God Sarah. I fought him, I fought him." She broke down into sobs as my rage boiled over. Erik was getting nervous as a breeze started blowing through the room.
"I'm going to kill the bastard!" I seethed. She kept crying and looked ashamed. I struggled to calm my words for her. "Jess, who hurt you? Who did this to you?"
"That college guy." She whispered.
I closed my eyes and didn't want to ask [link widoczny dla zalogowanych], but I had to. I had to know how bad he hurt her. "Did he...?"
"No, no. I fought him Sarah. I hurt him. He didn't do it, I got away. I ran. I ran away." She continued between sobs. "You were right." She dropped her head in shame and my heart broke.
"Shhh, don't you say that. You did good Jess, you did real good. I'm proud of you." My hands were clinched on the table and I struggled with my anger and rage. Erik dropped to his knees beside me and took my hand in his. He was worried about me losing control. I didn't care about losing control right then. I wanted to murder that bastard. I wanted to hunt him down and see how he liked it if I fought back. Let's see how tuff of a guy he is when I unleash my rage on him. I felt the fire, but not like before. They may have rerouted it, but pure utter rage was still going to be able to call it.
Erik reached his hand up to my microphone and muted it. "You feel it don't you?" I nodded at him but refused to look at him. "Are you losing control?" I shook my head. "Do you mind if I monitor it?" I turned and looked at him confused. "It won't hurt. You'll barely notice me." I nodded at him and turned my microphone back on. I felt a warm electrical pulse run up my arm. There was a small intrusion in my mind, but not enough to stop my thinking.
Jess looked back up at me after she controlled her crying. "Sarah, I was so scared. I didn't know what to do. He had me pinned in his car."
"But you stopped him. You fought back. You did exactly what you needed to." I assured her.
She nodded at me as she sniffled. "I kicked him as hard as I could. I just kept kicking and screaming at him until I could get free."
"Jess, I wish I was there. I wish I could wrap my arms around you and take the pain away."
"Me too." She gave me a tiny half smile but it made her wounds distort and look even worse.
"Jess, what is his name?" I asked. She and Erik both gave me questioning looks.
"Sarah, I know you. If I tell you, you would hunt him down. I won't let you commit murder and go to jail."
"You only go to jail if you're caught." I said acidly. "He hurt you, Jess, he at least deserves pay back."
"I love you Sarah. You are my sister, but now I'm going to protect you and not tell you his name. If you want to help me then just talk to me, besides the police have already picked him up!"
"I love you to Jess. I feel helpless sitting here so far away from you." Tears started streaming down my cheeks and my rage was dying down.
We continued talking for another hour. When Erik saw my rage had come back under control he released me and went back over to his chair to study his paperwork. Jess hadn't even known I didn't call her for several days [link widoczny dla zalogowanych], because her mom came and took her home after her attack. She told me she was going to counseling sessions. I told her I was happy she was talking to someone.
It would take her awhile to get over being attacked, but Jess was strong. She was a lot like me, and she can push bad things aside and move past them. She told me she wasn't going to be able to call me again until Sunday night. Her mom was keeping her home for the rest of the week and it was difficult to dial in from her mom's house. She would be returning to school on Sunday.
When I hung up from Jess, Erik picked me up and took me into the North Sitting room. He sat down with me in his lap and my leg resting on the sofa. "Do you think she will get past this?" he asked while he brushed a few stray strands of hair back from my face.
"Yes, she is very strong. She's like me and is used to burying bad things. You can't let them win."
"Sarah, are you sure you're better off having buried your memories? I've seen what you went through. If you need to talk...." he trailed off.
"I don't like to remember." I said as I buried my face in his chest.
"Ok Baby. I won't push you, just don't let it slowly eat at you. I will always be here for you."
"You are already helping me move on. Your trust and faith in me means more to me than you can ever imagine." I said.
Erik squeezed his arms around me and held me nice and snug without crushing my ribs. "Trusting you and having faith in your goodness is easy. I've never met anyone like you before." He paused and looked down at my face. I looked up at him before he continued. "Your faith in me amazes me." He whispered in a strangled voice.
"Sshhh" I said as I pressed my fingers to his lips. I didn't want to hear him doubting himself. His face still looked upset though.
Erik stood up and set me down on the sofa. "I need to go make some phone calls before dinner. I'll have Charlotte bring you your dinner in here." He handed me my English Literature book. "You have some reading to catch up on. Mrs. Johnson said the class is up to chapter 13." He smiled at me.
I wrinkled my nose at him, "No getting out of homework?" I asked.
He gently laughed at me. "Sorry. Tomorrow, I will go pick up the rest of your homework assignments."
"Just what I wanted to hear!" I said sarcastically.
"Call me if you need me." He said as he walked out of the room.
I read a few chapters before Charlotte brought me my dinner and pain medicine. I ate only enough food to keep my stomach from getting sick, when I took the pain medicine. I don't have much of an appetite when I lay around all day. I took my pills and let them knock me out.
****
When I woke up on Tuesday morning, I was back in my room and I had to pee like crazy. I very slowly and carefully pushed myself up off the bed. I held onto the wall for balance and awkwardly hobbled my way to my bathroom. I was pleasantly surprised to feel my ribs a tiny bit less swore, or else the painkillers were still working. After I found much relief in the bathroom, I started cleaning myself up. I washed my face and hair in the sink then I gave myself a quick wash down with a washcloth. There was a gentle knock at my bathroom door then Erik's hand appeared with clean clothes.
I was startled then said, "thank you" as I took the clothes from him.
"You're welcome" he called as he closed the door again.
After I pulled on my clean bra, underwear, T-shirt and short Denham skirt, I opened the bathroom door. Erik was standing in front of my door with an eyebrow raised at me. He looked me over and shook his head. "You are incredibly impatient!" he said.
"Yes, but you already knew that." I smiled wryly at him.
"Yes, I did." He looked at my matted hair. "Do you need help with your hair?"
"Yes please, it hurts to raise my arms that much." I said.
He smiled then picked me up and took me over to the side of my bed. He went into my bathroom and brought my towel and hair brush back out. He sat behind me and towel dried my hair. I loved it when he played with my hair. I closed my eyes and enjoyed the sensation of his fingers running through my hair. He brushed my hair very gently making sure not to pull my hair when he worked on the tangles. When he finished brushing out the tangles he ran his fingers through my hair lifting it to add volume and to break up my waves. I was lost in his touches.
"Where would you like to sit for breakfast?" he asked.
"Can I try sitting at the caf?table this morning?" I asked.
"Sure, are you ready?" I nodded at him then he picked me up and took me down for breakfast.
Erik propped my leg up on a nearby chair then brought our cereal over to the table. "When are you leaving today?" I asked.
"I'll be leaving after breakfast. I'm combining a few errands, so I will be back after lunch." He seemed so matter of fact. I was watching him. He felt me watching him then glanced up at me.
I smiled at him when he looked at me, "So any chance you can bring me a Turkey Caboose sandwich for lunch?"
He looked relieved by my question. I know he was expecting to me to ask about his extra errands. He would tell me if he could or if he felt comfortable telling me. He is more of a closed book than I am.
"If you don't mind a late lunch, then I would love to bring you back a Turkey Caboose sandwich. I might try the Pastrami Madness sandwich this time." He said.
"I would wait a week!" I exclaimed.
"When I leave this morning, I'll let Charlotte know that I'll be bringing you back your lunch. She'll probably bring you a light snack."
"Thank you [link widoczny dla zalogowanych], you just made my day and you could make it better if you accidentally lost my homework assignments on the way home!" I said slyly.
Erik stood up and took our bowls over to the sink. "That won't be happening. You are getting too far behind, especially in your math class." He was speaking in his authoritative tone, so there was no more teasing and joking.
He came back over and picked me up. "Where do you want to go to read your English book?" he asked.
"The North sitting room is fine." I mumbled.
Erik sat me on the sofa and got me situated before he said goodbye and left. I picked up my book and started reading. This book was much harder for me to get into reading. I didn't like the writing style and the tone of the book was too serious. I always found myself frustrated while I read it. I was able to get through three more chapters before Charlotte brought me in a coke and some chips.
"Thanks Charlotte! I need a distraction. This book is horribly boring. I don't see why it is considered a classic." I told her.
Charlotte turned the cover to her, so she could read the title. She scrunched up her nose. "I agree with you Dear. I had to read that book as well, and I don't think I understood a single word I read. I still can't tell you what the book is about."
I laughed at her. "I know. I spend so much time rereading sentences and paragraphs trying to understand what the writer is talking about. It's like I'm reading a foreign language!"
She laughed and agreed then left me alone again. I slowly ate my chips and drank my coke while I tried to procrastinate a little longer. I don't know why I was waiting. I only had one more chapter to go until I was caught up, well caught up until I got my new assignments this afternoon. Finally I threw my head back on the pillow and forced my way through another very painful chapter.
When I finally finished the last chapter, I tossed the book to the floor and rubbed the bridge of my nose. That book was giving me a headache and made me frustrated. I stared at the piano for awhile before I decided to hobble my way over to it. I sat down and started playing with the keys until I could find the right chords for "To Where You Are".
Who can say for certain
Maybe you抮e still here
I feel you all around me
Your memories so clear
Deep in the stillness
I can hear you speak
You抮e still an inspiration
Can it be
That you are mine
Forever love
And you are watching over me from up above
I watched as Charlotte came in and sat down at the love seat to watch me. I smiled at her and continued playing.
Fly me up to where you are
Beyond the distant star
I wish upon tonight
To see you smile
If only for awhile to know you抮e there
A breath away抯 not far
To where you are
Are you gently sleeping
Here inside my dream
And isn抰 faith believing
All power can抰 be seen
As my heart holds you
Just one beat away
I cherish all you gave me everyday
抍ause you are mine
Forever love
Watching me from up above
I looked up at Charlotte and noticed Erik was sitting beside her. I smiled at them then turned back to the piano keyboard.
And I believe
That angels breathe
And that love will live on and never leave
Fly me up
To where you are
Beyond the distant star
I wish upon tonight
To see you smile
If only for awhile
To know you抮e there
A breath away抯 not far
To where you are
I know you抮e there
A breath away抯 not far
To where you are
When I finished playing, Charlotte walked over to me and gave me a big hug. "They are always with you Honey! I know they hear you." she whispered in my ear.
"Thank you Charlotte." I whispered back.
After Charlotte left the room, Erik walked over to the piano and never took his eyes off of me. He was searching for something in my face. I could see it in his expression. He wanted to ask me something.
"Where would you like to eat?" he finally asked, but that wasn't what he really wanted to ask.
"Any place where we can feel the warmth of the sun." I replied.
He handed me the sandwiches and carried me outside. He took me out to the indoor pool and sat me down in a chaise lounge chair next to the wall of windows. The sun was radiating in the room and the warmth was wonderful. I handed him his sandwich and started to unwrap mine. He was still watching me.
I took a bite of my sandwich but continued to watch him. He slowly took a bite and his face looked so confused. We took a few more bites then I finally put my sandwich down.
"Erik, please ask me what is on your mind." I asked gently.
"I don't know how to word my questions." He said looking confused. "I'm remembering images in your memory and I'm remembering what you told Gezabelle at the council meeting."
"Yes" I encouraged him to continue, but I thought I knew what he wanted to ask me.
"You feel your family with you?" he asked.
"Sometimes" I replied.
"But you think they guide you?" he asked.
I smiled at him. "Do you remember me telling you about my father's lullaby?" I asked him.
"Yes, you said you think your answers are hidden in it!" he replied.
"Correct. All of the words have come back to me. The power it evokes is getting stronger. When you read my mind did you see the lyrics or the purpose hidden in my memories?" I asked him.
"No, I didn't see the lyrics at all." He seemed frustrated by that.
"I think I understand a little more now." He looked at my eyes again. I reached over and grabbed his hand. "I had sung the lullaby before I was attacked. I felt them with me. During the attack I heard a voice telling me to summon the air then they warned me to look behind me before I was attacked from behind. They are protecting me."
He sat there comprehending my words. "Erik, when I was in the hallway at the council meeting, I had sung the lullaby when Gezabelle walked in. She saw them around me. It made her cry." I told him.
He looked so stunned. "The fog is your family." he said as he finally comprehended.
"Yes." I said with a smile.
"They really are with you. What does that mean?" he asked.
"I don't know yet, but I know it is part of my powers and part of who I am meant to become." I told him.
"You can call to them anywhere?" he asked.
"I don't know. When I am standing in the hallway it is my strongest connection to them. I can feel them and I am enveloped in an immense warmth and I can smell my father's cologne. But I heard voices compelling me to take martial arts when I was away at school. I've only fully felt them in the hallway outside of the study though." I told him.
Erik's eyes shot up at me. He comprehended something I didn't get yet. "The hallway is the center of the house." He said slowly and turned his eyes away. He was lost in thought again.
I let him sit quietly and work through his thoughts as I continued to eat my sandwich. I was curious what was going through Erik's mind, but he looked like he needed time to think. When I finished eating, I leaned back in my lounge chair and watched the dust particles float through the air within the beams of light shining through the windows. I heard the rumple of paper and I turned my head to see Erik finishing his sandwich. I was happy to see him finally eating.
I went back to enjoying the sun radiating through the windows and I closed my eyes as I listened to Erik move around.
"You look happy." he said.
"I am" I said.
"What are you thinking about?" he asked.
I smiled wider and shook my head. "Nothing" I said.
"Why won't you tell me?" he asked softly.
"You might not want to hear it." I warned him as I turned my head to look at him.
"I doubt that. I want to know what you dream about even if it might hurt." His brows were scrunched together and he looked worried.
I looked at him then returned my eyes back up to watch the dust particles float through the air. "I was thinking about you." I whispered.
He was silent but from the corner of my eye I could see him watching my face. He came over and sat next to me. He put his hands on either side of me and leaned down to look at me. "Tell me." He whispered.
My heart skipped a beat and his eyes were piercing mine. "You make me whole. You are everything I've ever wanted and I would do anything you ever asked of me." I raised my hands to caress his face and to trace his mouth. I desperately wanted to kiss him then.
He dropped down to his elbows and his face was right above mine. He looked like he wanted to kiss me too. He was looking at my eyes and my mouth. He seemed so conflicted. Suddenly he wrapped his arms around me and lifted me up to him as he sat back down. He pressed my head to his chest and he kissed the top of my head. "What are we doing?" he whispered. "Baby, you know we can't do this."
I shook my head and tears came down my cheeks. "Don't say that." I struggled to say.
"Sshh, please don't cry." He held me tighter and stroked my hair. I drenched his shirt with my tears while he held me and tried to calm me down. I clung to him afraid he would disappear on me.
After awhile without a word he lifted me up and carried me to my room. He laid me on my bed and kissed my forehead. "Please try to rest."
After he left, I tried to forget my heartache. I didn't understand how what we had could be so wrong. He's only six years older than me. In normal society they make such a big deal about age gaps, but we are not normal humans. That was very obvious when I turned eighteen. I went from a teenage girl to a woman over night. I wish I knew what our societies rules were about love and relationships.
I drifted off for a quick nap while I thought about Erik. For the first time I dreamt of him. I dreamt of him holding me and kissing me as we stood naked in a moonlit room. The room has draped in white curtains and the floor was covered in a white rug and white pillows. He laid me on the pillows and kissed every inch of me. Our bodies entwined together and the rest of the world no longer existed. It was just us. His touch would make me tremble and our passion consumed us. We clung to each other and made love endlessly. Everything felt real in our beautiful made up world.
When I woke Erik was sitting on my window seat watching me. "How was your dream?" he asked softly. I didn't understand the look in his eyes. Was that desire? His eyes were glazed over and his eyes were piercing mine again.
"Perfect." I said simply then I closed my eyes and plopped my head back on my pillow.
"Do I get to hear about it?" he asked.
"Nope, you're not bursting my happy bubble this time!" I told him.
He chuckled and came over to me. "Okay. I won't ask. I want to keep you happy."
"Good!" I retorted.
"Are you hungry? Would you like some dinner?" he asked.
"Not really. What time is it?" I asked him though I could have just turned my face away from his to look.
"It's almost 7:00pm." he replied.
"What's for desert tonight?" I asked with a devious little grin.
"Hey young Lady, aren't you supposed to eat dinner in order to eat desert?" he said trying not to laugh.
"I had an early dinner, so I should still get a desert!" I teased.
"Well even if you don't eat dinner, I'm sure Charlotte wouldn't mind bringing you a little desert. If you think you deserve it of course. Did you finish your reading today?"
"Yes!" I beamed.
He couldn抰 fight it any longer and laughed. "Alright, I'll let Charlotte know. Call me if you need help. After dinner, I'll be in my room making phone calls." He said.
That was the last I saw of Erik that night. After I ate my berry cobbler, I went to the bathroom myself and got ready for bed. Charlotte had given me my pain medicine with my berry cobbler. I left my tray on the floor next to my bed, when I turned out the light and went to sleep.
I spent the next two days and nights working on my homework. I couldn't believe how far behind I got. Not only did I have to catch up, but I had to work on the following weekend's homework as well since I was going to be gone at my competition. When I crashed in my bed Thursday night, I was finally caught up with all of my homework, though I did not have time to do the extra math problems that Mr. Hill had assigned. I didn't see too much of Erik. He was locked inside the study most of the time.
When I woke on Friday, I found Erik in my room playing with my hair. "Good Morning." I said.
"Good Morning." He smiled at me then kissed my forehead. "I packed your bag for you already. I wanted to do something for you before I had to leave this morning." he said.
I frowned. "You're leaving already?" I asked.
He traced the lines of my frown and laughed softly. "Don't worry. I need to go finish your emancipation papers, but I promise I will be there tomorrow for your competition."
I smiled at him and asked "It's really over?"
"Yes Baby. After today our society will consider me your guardian and protector. Though those only pertain to our society. The rest of the world will think of you as a legal adult who can make her own choices." he said.
"So you're stuck with me now?" I said lightly and grinning.
"More like you're stuck with a very overprotective and overbearing man watching you like a hawk!" He grinned back.
"So much for ever being allowed out on a date again!" I teased.
"Not on your life!" He confirmed. I just laughed at him.
"When do you need to leave?" I asked.
"As soon as you get dressed today and I take you downstairs." he replied.
"Ok, can you find me some comfortable clothes to wear?" I asked.
He grinned at me. "I already did, they are sitting in the bathroom waiting for you. Do you need help?" he said
"Can you just take me in there then I should be ok?" I said.
After Erik took me into my bathroom and left me. I washed my face and brushed my teeth. I washed myself down with a washcloth and then washed my hair in the sink. I slowly got dressed and towel dried my hair. When I opened the bathroom door, Erik was standing by the door waiting for me to take me downstairs. He took me into the North Sitting room and set me on the Victorian sofa. He propped up my leg and covered my lap with a blanket.
"I need to run now Baby. You're bag is by the front door and the wheel chair is out in the hallway as well. I'll have Charlotte bring you in your breakfast." He kissed my forehead and raced out the door.
At 3pm Mel and Gezabelle showed up to pick me up. Charlotte hugged me goodbye and wished me luck at my competition.
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